I was in a large house that was built in the 70’s. You could tell at the time it was built it was very cutting edge and elegant, but time had worn it down. I found the house to be quite an enigma, because some parts of it were so nice and other parts were very aged. There were a lot of rooms. One of the rooms had a bed that had been flooded with water that had become dirty over time. Another of the rooms had a fire place that was flooded with water. I was there with other people. There was a couple who had french names and had been together a very long time but never married. The girl was Serena, an aquaintance from high school and the guy was someone I didn’t recognized but instinctively liked because of his gentle/mild nature. During the dream Serena decided that their relationship had run it’s course and that she was moving on. It made me very sad because the couple had so much history together, they had lived abroad in Europe, written a book together, and even been on TV together. I could tell that the guy did not feel the same way as Serena but was letting her go because he had to.

Then there was a different couple that showed up in my bed (One of the rooms in the house belonged to me). The guy looked like Sean Gafner. They wanted me to leave so they could have sex and I told them that this was my bed and to go in the other room. They didn’t want to because that was the room with the flooded bed. But they left and I presumed they went and had sex on the floor in the other room.

Then suddenly I was in a bathroom in the same house. Someone had recently taken a shower. I was sitting on the bathroom counter and the mirror was all fogged. Captain Picard was in the room with a few other people and he saw that the mirror was vibrating and realized that an earthquake was happening. We all ran outside for some reason to see the quake, but the tremors weren’t that bad.  Then they went away. I looked up into the sunset and Serena’s ex-boyfriend was flying a plane that looked like it had been made out of a big straw hat. I was sad for him.

Images/Symbols: Beds, mirror, straw plane

Emotions: Sadness, regret, subdued

I was married to two Stevens.  One Steven was more sensual/sexual, the other was more romantic and sensitive. I was at a family function with both of them and was slightly embarassed that I had two husbands but at the same time it felt normal to me. I was with the sensitive one and we were wading in a pool/fountain in the backyard.  I had a digital camera and it was getting wet. There were a lot of bright colors and flowers around the area where we were and he was saying very romantic things to me. 

The dream flashed and I was with the sensual Steven. We were making love in our bed and I was enjoying the adventurous feeling of being with him. I did feel guilty that I was leaving the sensitive Steven out and so afterward I went over to him to give him some attention. He seemed somewhat hurt.  At the end of the dream I was with both of them, alternately giving each attention.

Emotions:  Giddyness, guilt, affection

Characters/Symbols: Steven, fountain/pool, bright colors, digital camera, blankets

Very strange dream last night. One of my candidate’s last names was flashing in my mind over and over  “Elyko.”  I usually can’t read or see words in my dreams. What’s even stranger is that I got an email from her today saying that she was definitely laid off from her current position and was now very much in need of employment. Weird coincidence? Maybe not. I think I should pray further about this.

I was sitting at the kitchen table and Bethany’s head was on my plate. I was eating her hair like spaghetti, like it was the most normal thing ever.

I know for a fact that this is a representation of my desire to seek Bethany’s counsel right now. I know she would be able to give me valuable insight on how to handle Steven’s enlistment in the army, but we’ve lost touch so long ago it would be hard to rekindle the friendship at this point. But she has lived now with a husband in the army for at least 5 years and has even had a child in the process. She has lived through his deployment and would be able to tell me how to get through this next couple of years. I need to stop burning my bridges.

Dreamed Steven and I were on a hike and we ran into Josh and Megan and Emily and Ty. They were near an outcropping of rocks and the sun was setting and casting a lovely light on the area. Both couples were having their photos taken. Emily and Ty were married and I was happy for them and realized I really missed Emily.  I have dreamed of her very frequently lately. I am regretting losing the friendships I had in college when I moved to San Diego. Some of my more religious friends didn’t handle the change in my lifestyle very well…Emily was one of them. She abandoned me when I really needed her love and acceptance the most. I think I will always regret losing touch with her, but I am much too prideful to try and break down that wall anymore. She is gone from my life.

I had the most lovely dream the other night. I was hugging my father. But a real hug – a way  I had never hugged him in real life. It was a long tight hug, and I felt I was drawing the love I needed from him. And he was really hugging me back. In reality I never felt his hugs were genuine, but in the dream there was a real exchange of love and affection.  And it felt so real. I carried the memory of it throughout the entire next day and felt strangely close to him.

It’s been quite some time since I posted here, and a lot has happened in my life. I need to continue recording my dreams. There are messages that I have been ignoring and I know my subconscious is still trying to get through to me. I feel this is important for the life of my soul. I need transcendence and mystery in my life and my dreams provide that in many ways.

Lately I have been dreaming about running. When I was younger I could never run in my dreams, I always felt like I was running through quicksand or tar and not getting anywhere. But lately I have been running lightly and quickly, without effort. And it feels good.

Last night I dreamt I was at Lake Tahoe with two faceless girlfriends. It was summer and there was a fire in the mountains. We were sitting on the side of a mountain path admiring the handsome firefighters as they passed. We followed the firefighters lakeside where all of these gorgeous men were playing football and BBQing. One of them ran into me as he was jumping to catch the football and hurt my calf. I played the damsel in distress for attention.

As I was laying on the ground massaging my calf I looked up and saw a storm coming in. I told the girls that we had better get back to the hotel. The storm cloud was cone shaped (not a tornado) and looked ominous. As we were running back through the woods we were trying to stay out in the open away from the trees to avoid the lightning that was flashing. It was very dark from the storm and I was scared but I was running easily and much more quickly than my two friends. We reached the hotel and then Steven woke me up.

I have been dreaming about attention from men a lot lately. I think since getting married I have been extra careful about associating with men, or even looking at them. I wonder if the tight rein I have been keeping myself on is causing this “backlash” in my dreams. Seems a reasonable and safe way for that need to give itself expression.

I was in a pool doing a synchronized swimming routine. But something was terribly wrong because every time I went below water I saw a dead body floating near me. Someone was killing people and they were trying to get me but I kept eluding them and miraculously continued with the routine.

I haven’t a clue what this dream meant.

I was standing beneath the monkey bars in the play set I used to have. My father came down from heaven as a hostess cupcake, complete with wrapper and all. He spoke to me for a while and I wept. I don’t remember everything he said, but he told me that heaven was being allowed to touch earth through his visitation. I told him I missed him, and he said I miss you too, honey. I remember loving the sound of his voice, hearing it again was so lovely. But I was weeping very hard because I was sad and I missed him.

I believe this was a true visitation. His voice was so clear and the emotions so intense that I know this was different from all the other dreams I’ve had about him. I think he was trying to tell me that he was being allowed to come down here and influence things for a time, because since this dream, all 3 of his sisters have had major spiritual awakenings and have begun going to church – completely out of the blue and with no resistance. I know with certainty that he is behind it.

I was mourning my father’s death. Mostly I was crying because his death was so horrible. What we had to go through, what he went through – I was crying for the trauma of the event. They were deep sobs, filled with so much emotion, and it felt good to release them.

What’s interesting about this is that I haven’t been crying in my waking over his death. I haven’t really been mourning at all. I’ve been experiencing most of my grief in my dreams.